(T-shirt: $25 by Damien Correll)
Hey everyone,
Bit of an off-topic post here, but I've just discovered that fellow fashion and beauty blogger - Pippa from Clashing Time - has created a second blog about cyberbullying. It's specifically for bloggers who have recieved hateful comments and messages, but everyone can share their stories.
The issue of Cyber Bullying has come up again recently, after a teenager Alexis Pilkinton ended her life after recieving a series of threats and taunts through social networking sites - notably Formspring.me.
This is why anti-bullying sites and blogs such as Pippa's are so important to raise awareness.
Personally, I've been lucky enough (so far!) not to recieve much harassment.
Sure, people have been rude - but nothing personal. And I thought having a blog where my dress size is the TITLE would have been a target for attacks from day one.
However I've recently spoken to someone who knows all too well what it's like to recieve horrible messages day after day.
I'll just provide a small history so you have the context:
Get Out by The Vines
I've been a massive fan of Australian garage rock band The Vines since I was about 12, but things can get pretty dry with them on the news front.
This is because they rarely tour or do international promotions, due to lead singer and songwriter Craig Nicholls having Aspergers Syndrome (a mild form of Autism) and a phobia of flying.
They release an album every few years, but the months and months inbetween, there is very little for fans to talk about.
But in May 2009, his sister Jessica very kindly snapped a few pictures of her big brother recording on a four-track in his bedroom and uploaded them to The Vines official forum, so everyone could see he was happy and healthy.
Lovely right?
Only for no reason, some fans have started attacking Jessica online - again, via Formspring.me.
WHY?!
I asked Jessica if any this phases her. Thankfully, she seems a lot stronger than I would be!
Jessica and her kitty-kat!
How do the mean comments on Formspring affect you?
Honestly they don't get to me, if I was worried by peoples negativity I would never have set up the account because in doing so you have to expect the usual "zomg ur lyk the dummest fat s**t aye" type comments!
How do you deal with them?
I shut my laptop, get away from crazy internet world for a minute and surround myself with the people I love that remind me how happy and lucky I am.
Have they ever made you want to step away from The Vines community? Or social networking in general?
YES!!!!!!! It's not the comments about how fat I am or how ugly my hair is that get to me .. it's the ones about my brother! Say what you like about me but start making extremely personal/rude digs at him and I will tear your head off.
At times it has made me want to just throw in the towel and not be associated with Vines fans constantly dissing Craig or the way the band works but then I remember there are some beautiful people out there who genuinely love and appreciate his music and I wanna be around to keep them updated and in touch with the band.
Craig and Jessica
The press has in the past said some hurtful things about your brother - has he given you any advice on how to deal with the negativity?
He pays no attention to the media and just tells me to do the same.
It's simple advice and perhaps easier said than done but what else can you really do?
What do you think the trolls get out of leaving mean comments to somebody they don't even know?
I just think it's their own insecurities and jealousy that drives them to try and bring others down. Somehow they must find it satisfying I suppose when really it's nothing more than pathetic.
Cheers, Jessica! :) xxx
Be sure to check out Pippa's Anti-Bullying blog and share your stories!
At the end of the day everyone, just remember the rule of thumb:
it's nice to be nice!
Muchos love,
MessyCarla.
Posts
11 comments:
Amazing Post Carla! I had no idea about that poor girl, Alexis, that's simply awful (also having read the post you linked to i believe her family when they say that her death wasn't down to the bullying, but if she was in counselling beforehand it probably pushed her. And the fact that the taunting continued after she had killed herself is just totally sick). I absolutely agree with Jessica about the bullying being about insecurities, and jealousy. It must especially be easy when it's over the internet as you can be totally anonymous. It's spineless and just pathetic.
I hatehatehate internet bullies. It's so cowardly. Even a sly comment on someone's blog like 'god you look ugly today' can be so heartbreaking. You would never say it to their face so why does the internet make it acceptable?! This is a great post though, I always believe if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all.
Trolls are basically the worst things about the internet all rolled into one. I hate when people think they can hide behind a keyboard and just say whatever the hell they want, it's just spineless and pathetic.
And thanks for the link to Pippa's blog. Seems like she's doing a really great job. =]
Whilst it's obvious that not everyone is going to agree/like the same things it's so disgusting that people get pleasure from tearing others down. Personal insults are so unnecessary and ridiculous. The sad part is the people doing it don't realise just how pathetic they are; yes the comments have the desired affect of causing upset but in the long run the only person that looks stupid is their insignificant selves.
That girl is not fat or ugly at all, I think she's absolutely gorgeous! I hate personal insults it's so sad and pathetic even worse when it is done ANONYMOUSLY on the INTERNET.xx
Lillian: Thank You! Yeah it was just so shocking, something has to be done to prevent these things from happening. People are just spineless, I agree. Hope you're feeling better, missy xxxxx
Helen: Me too! It's like WHY bother? :/
Poppy: Agreed, it's just awful. Pippa's blog is awesome - her fashion one is worth a read, too :)
StephanieDJL: I KNOW, I still don't honestly understand why people would get pleasure out of being so mean, it's just sick. :(
doublevodkacoke: Oh Jessica's SO pretty, and seems very sweet!
This is a great post. I think people who cyber bully are cowards. I think this is the kind of post that should be advertised, especially in the fatshion community at the moment, where some people are anonymously bullying - amongst ourselves!
Great post - I am going to RT you on twitter. x.
DEFINATELY! The whole drama with the NY Conference is a joke (Petty jealousy - oh I'm sorry I thought we were past school now...!) and some stuff within the UK community too.
I was all set to take a step back last week, but I'm just concentrating on doing what makes me happy, and why I made this blog in the whole place - to make fashion a positive thing for everyone to enjoy. I'm never getting involved with schoolchildren drama :)
Cheers for the RT - I love your blog! :) xxx
I have never and will never understand people who need to put others down.
It's the internet - it's so easy to just click and leave a site without having to hurt other people.
Me either! My philosophy is - don't like, don't read :) Life would be boring if we all liked the same things anyway! xxx
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